When someone politely asks how you’re doing and you reply with, “I’m tired,” it can often feel like a massive understatement.
Let’s be honest with ourselves, friends: “tired” means completely different things depending on the day, your body, what life is throwing at you, and so much more. If you live with chronic fatigue, you know that standard vocabulary just doesn’t cut it.
To make sense of the exhaustion, we need a better dictionary. Here is a breakdown of how I personally like to consider the spectrum of fatigue—from everyday weariness to the depths of soul-deep depletion.
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Pillar I – Regular “Tired”
This is the kind of tiredness that normal people experience. You had a long week, you stayed up a little too late watching a show, or you pushed through a busy workday. A good night’s sleep—or even just a strong cup of coffee and a lazy Saturday—mostly resets the system. It’s a physical feeling of needing rest, and frankly, is usually easier to manage in the grander scheme.
Pillar II – Chronic Fatigue “Tired”
Chronic fatigue is a whole different beast. This feels like being so tired, you could comfortably sleep until 2028! While you’re feeling this level of tired, you still continue to show up every single day at (mostly) your best effort simply for the fact that you have so much going for you. It’s that strange, high-wire act of running on passion, purpose, and sheer willpower. Your brain and your calendar are full of exciting things, projects, and people you love, which forces your engine to keep turning—even when the dashboard warning lights are flashing red. You aren’t giving up, but your body is whispering (or shouting) that it needs backup.
Explicit permission given to you right here, right now, to take a seat and a deep breath even when the world feels like it’s burning.
Pillar III – Bone Tired
Here, the physical exhaustion stops being a symptom and starts feeling like there’s a heck of a lot less hope to make it through the day. You can sleep 9 to 10 hours a night, and it still isn’t enough. Moving around feels like trying to walk through thick, sticky molasses. Simple, everyday tasks suddenly require an Olympic-level of mental math and physical stamina. Life doesn’t stop, but it becomes significantly harder to navigate when your bones feel like lead.
Personally, I have lived in a state of bone tiredness now for about the last 90 days. Let’s normalize being exhausted, and then actually honoring that feeling.
Pillar IV – Soul Tired
Soul tired is the deepest, heaviest layer of the fatigue spectrum. This is when the exhaustion has completely taken over and you can barely function, everything physically hurts, and you are completely emotionally depleted. It’s not just your body asking for a break—it’s your entire spirit running on empty. At this stage, productivity is out the window, pretending to be fine is impossible, and the only way forward is radical rest, gentleness, and permission to just be broken down for a minute.
I was soul tired through the entire month of July and it looked a lot like forcing myself out of bed in the morning, staring at blank walls, sleeping 14+ hours a day, and holding my dog close to bring me some semblance of purpose. When you’re soul tired, it is CRITICAL that you take the time you need to feel alright again, without self punishment.
Navigating the Fatigue Spectrum
If you find yourself cycling through these levels, please hear this: Your exhaustion doesn’t mean you are failing.
Whether you’re pushing forward because you have too much going on, or you’re stuck wading through the molasses of bone-deep fatigue, your experience is valid. Recognizing where you are on this spectrum is the first step toward giving yourself the grace you deserve.
Which level of tired are you navigating today? Let’s talk about it in the comments below, and as always, thank you for remaining chronically joyful with me. ♡
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